I have been accepted for a lung transplant.
So I guess I'm moving to Toronto.
I'm feeling incredibly overwhelmed but relieved that I can finally start planning things. The transplant coordinator asked if I was 'ready'. I said “I guess...”. I didn't really know what to say. I am ready for something to be happening but I don't think I am ready for an actual surgery. I am ready to feel better and would like to climb a flight of steps without getting short of breath.
I am still having a really hard time visualizing a positive outcome from the transplant. I know that I should be thinking about all the positive outcomes of a successful transplant but every time I think about it, all I think is that I have a pretty significant chance of dying during or after the surgery. Does that mean I'm not really ready? I'm not sure. Right now, I just have a mental block where I can't picture anything beyond a transplant. I guess because I've always known that I will most likely be getting a transplant when my lungs deteriorated, I always equated that to the end of life. I'm still going ahead with everything because I think it is the best option for me at this time.
So for logistics:
The transplant coordinator who called me said that they would like me there as soon as possible meaning October or November, definitely before Christmas. We are going to aim for October 1st as long as we can get everything arranged ahead of time. We will be giving up our apartment in Springhill and either move our stuff to Toronto or back to my parents place.
We can live within a 2 ½ hour radius from the Toronto General Hospital but the team really pushes for people to get an apartment downtown close to the hospital. They are obviously the most expensive apartments but hopefully we can find something within our range that does not have bedbugs or mice or cockroaches. We are planning right now to take our car up with us so we will have it to go on little excursions within our time limit. However, parking is super expensive so we may just go without.
When I get to Toronto, I will have a meeting with the main surgeon and team, and then I will officially be on the list. While I wait for lungs, I will be going to physiotherapy three times a week at the Toronto General Hospital, have monthly meetings with the specialists, and having regular check-ups with the CF team at St. Micheals Hospital. I will hopefully also be eating at a lot of delicious restaurants and going to fabulous shows.
Right now, I am still in PEI at the cottage so I can't start planning anything until I get back home with non-3G internet. I am going to spend the rest of the week swimming and kayaking and trying not to worry about the future